Is it just me who reads blogs and wonders……how people can have such an idyllic life, the life I strive to have…. of children who don’t wake at the crack of dawn and begin arguing with each other…arguing which continues most of the day until I am fit to bang may head against the wall……mothers who spend their days, walking, playing, crafting, baking, cooking…drinking frothy coffee out of pretty cups with pretty spoons and napkins to go along side and taking photos of all these activities too…when do they clean their homes (they always look perfect in the pictures), do their laundry, iron and clean the loo as the amount of makes they have to show I would need to craft 24/7. Also I wish I knew where they get their finances too as crafting, home baking and all they do in their ‘perfect’ lives costs so much money….maybe I should change my blog to how a single parent family live on £50 a week (including buying groceries etc out of that), refereeing children who most of the time hate each other, a mother who is constantly tattered from fitting in studying, 6 school runs a day, cleaning, washing, ironing and cooking wholesome meals on a very short shoestring…….so…is it just me who wonders??
21 comments:
Strangely that's exactly what I think about you. How do you manage to study, do up your house so nice and craft so much with two young children as well.
I guess most of us only blog about the nice bits of our daily existence.
We don't have perfect lives: we just don't share the crappy bits. It is a well known fact that the moment you open a book to study, the kids will start to fight. Be positive: star charts, rota of jobs for the kids, even little ones can dust with rewards. Praise good behaviour to the heavens, negotiate with them so they feel included and stick to rules with well defined punishments should they break them e.g. time out, no treat etc. Re money: I am on disability and still have to pay for some medicines: no NHS in Ireland. I scrimp and save and can do wonders with mince and beans lol. And get yoru backside on my RAK list: dunno if you still have my email details but I have noticed that when I am really down some postal angel sends me something nice, care of a blogger. And stick with the studying: I did my degree as a full time working mother who also home educated her children. It really will be worth it (BTW I don't mind if you dont add this to your post: I just want you to know I am sending hugs) xxxx
It does get easier as the children get older and more independent. My young daughter's favorite words were "I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!, stomp the foot three times and slam the bedroom door. Now she just turned 31, has a job she loves working with the public, and is my best friend. Better times are ahead!
Lol - no it's not just you who wonders. Yup, I feel quite inferior sometimes with my not so perfect in the pictures life and my attempts to be like the picture perfect blogs just never goes quite right :-) we probably all look at other blogs and wonder but then people will look at our and think it. Reading between the lines of your post - keep smiling this tough time you are going through will pass and the kids will stop arguing - honest!!!) xxxx
We've all gone through the crappy times. Times when you wonder seriously if it was all worth it or not.
I choose not to post about the bad times on my blog, because I figure who is going to want to read that??
Our children are older now, the problems and concerns you had with them when they were little are replaced by other concerns as they move into adulthood. That is just being a Mom I guess. We always worry. I remember the kids fighting when little as well.
Take care.
I agree w/Colleen, when my oldest DD was between 13 and 16 she "hated" me...now she's 34 and wonders how I "did it"..lol she has a 17 year old son now and I put the "hope you have a child as bad as you" curse on her and it does work..lol Now she's my BF and it does get better hun..
Hugs, Shar
I have wondered....but then I look at the things I post. I do tend to use my blog to remind myself of the good times...as a reminder that no matter how tough things get at times, we do manage to have faith, fun, family and love....not that we don't have those moments where we want to throw our hands up and just give up! I really don't think my readers want to see pictures of or hear about my desire for a haz~mat suit when I go in to clean my boys bathroom...😳
Hugs! I agree with Angela....I am in awe of all that you have to do!
I don't think any of us have perfect lives. I just don'tblog much about the crap. Sometimes I do if things have really got to me but my blog isn't about perfection.
Yes, is true, I think we all wonder, but I agree with Catherine, I use my blog to reflect on the good things. My children are not angels but at 15 and 16 still fight like cats and dogs and I still bang my head against the wall :) I keep asking my mom where the manual is for them, they didn't issue me one. It's all part of the journey, good, bad. If I didn't go through so many hard times, I think I wouldn't feel so blessed about my life now. When you feel overwhelmed, take it one day at a time.
I think most people put the little free time they have,for example, a few minutes ago I put a post about cakes!, and another day I put one on pasta carbonara, and in between some cross stitch. Are bits of happy moments that I like to share. The perfect house, do not know how they do, my house is a mess, and I have a daughter and a husband amoeba. space that they see, space they occupy it.
Like others have said we blog about the nice stuff of our daily lives.
Elisa I think you do a wonderful job never doubt that. Some days after I get home from work and then have to rush Out again to get little son then we rush home to him moaning about how he wants more chocolate or something - I just put the kettle on. My kids are 18 and 5 so they don't tend to argue. Sweetie do what I do - when all is quiet and little one is in bed I pour a glass of wine listen to the silence (unless of course hubby is asleep and snoring on the sofa) look at my stitching and think 'bliss'. xx
Ditto what Stitcher Anon (and others) said. My blog is my "Happy Place" you really wouldn't want to read about my struggles with the Small Boy and his ASD.
And no offence, but I don't want to read a blog about lone parents surviving on very little - been there, done that, lost the weight! It's why I stopped going on the parenting forums because I get really upset and angry about the way this Government treats children.
I love all the amazing people I've met through blogging - you are my Anti-ds, just as addictive but less side-effects LOL
Oh yes, this is something I wonder about every so often. How can someone who is working full time, have a household to take care of, do their own cooking a opposed to going to a canteen or pub still do masses of crafting? Don't they ever to worry about anything breaking down, spend lots of time in a doctor's waiting room for regular check-ups, have commitments to other people?
The answer is, no, their lives aren't that much different from mine. Mostly we all don't blog much about the crap going on at home. I will tell my Ufo stitching group about my father's health troubles but I won't put it in the blog. I never know who is reading it and there are too many things that I don't want the world to know about. Looking at my blog you'd think I have tons of time for crafting. I don't. But I do snatch some time here or a longer session at weekends there same as everyone else. Same as you.
Hang in there, Elisa. Things will get better again, promise. Life has its ups and down. But would we be able appreciate the sun if it never rained?
I wanted my blog to be positive as I believe in the power of positive thinking.
When I was younger my life was more hectic and harder in many ways and I did not have time for blogging or stitching as I was running a business and taking on extra jobs to get my son through school.
I think being very organised helps(ed). I am up early and wizz around the house.
Life will get better but the road has lots of ups, downs, twists and turns.
I don't know about anyone else Eliza, but I'm pretty selective about what I blog, and even more so about which parts of the house I'll take pictures of. None of us have perfect lives, don't let it get to you.
PS sometimes the only thing that has stopped me throwing a bucket of water over my two to stop them fighting is the knowledge that I'd have to clean it up
Dear Elisa,
Arguing is what brothers and sisters do when they are younger, it's healthy as they are defining their own space. But then before you know it they are grown and flown. Enjoy the days when you’re happily ensconced in your favourite chair stitching and the children are happily playing. Love those bargains you find in charity shops. Some of my best frames and baskets once belonged to someone else. And thank God at the end of each day that you are well and have a roof over your head, friends, parents and that you have a gift of crafting. Money isn’t everything and you have two gorgeous children who are growing up with a knowledge that their Mum loves them.
I was where you are once and would love to go back to enjoy it all over again.
Chris xx
There are a couple of blogs that really get on my nerves with their sickly sweet perfect lives and I've had to stop reading them coz they were making me sick. No its not just you. You're normal! X
Oooh that sounded really harsh! Sorry about that. It must have been a pet peeve with me as well! x
If others are like "me" then they choose not to blog about all the bad stuff they have to face. I share some of the things that happen in my life but most I keep to myself.
No-one wants to know read about the daily challenges I have to keep a routine for my Son so he doesn't have his "Aspie meltdowns" or that he will only eat 5 foods and if they are not available he will refuse to eat. Or that if there is a fly in the house he won't go to the bathroom or sleep :) LOL.
My place looks like a bomb hit it most of the time, my kids fight like they are mortal enemies and I am in pain daily and I'm still trying to figure out why.
All that stuff is not worth any of my extra time. My stress relief is stitching, stitching, stitching and I have a feeling that it is for so many of us. I also don't want everyone to know everything about me.
I can only imagine how challenging it is to be a single mom but to me you are amazing in all that you accomplish.
Keep your chin up.....you have so many friends that care about you :)
I think we all do wonder about others. My two boys argue sometimes, its what family does but it can get me down at times. I try not to go on about bad stuff because I don't want to put people off and I don't necessarily want others to know. I have to say I think you do wonderfully and I can't imagine how hard it is being a single mum. Hugs.
Post a Comment